My comments are going to be shorter for this call. I feel like I answered everything fully. I edited out all the unnecessary talk and waiting for people to connect, etc. in the call; so it is lean and mean. There weren’t really any new topics discussed on this call, since it was the second call for the GC-6 group of posts. Also, I’m so deep into the next group of articles that it seems that many of you are kind of anticipating what is coming next. I talk about many of the topics that came up today in the next two articles. They are almost done. So rest up. They are big ones.
As you listen to the call, especially those of you who asked a question, really listen to what I responded. Often it almost sounds like I answered something a little different than you asked. It’s kind of funny for me to listen to it afterwards.
I’ve long been confused at what I actually do with people. But I think I’m starting to understand it better. I’m just listening without judging or thinking. So I hear what comes through your false self with my ears. The false self asks the question in the way that the characters who run your show will allow you to ask the question. But I also hear, not with my ears, what is projected underneath the clone-approved question. I’m responding to both questions. I’m saying what you need to hear. For some reason, some character is blocking you from hearing the True Self within on that topic, and so I’m saying it on your True Self’s behalf so that you can hear it from the outside.
After Kelly and I went through the Dark Ages of mentoring, she realized that I wasn’t bullshitting even if I sounded like I was. She said, “Cathy I let go on whatever you say to me or write to me in emails even if it sounds absolutely insane. You are always right.” That sounds arrogant to say, but what I say is always right. But it’s not me that is always right. It is our connected True Selves that are always right. So if you hear what I just said, then you are always right too. The True Self is perfect. It always knows the answer. It can do anything. So when people can’t hear me. I don’t take it personally. They don’t hear their inner True Self; and they can’t hear it from the outer person who is saying the same thing, so I can’t do anymore. They have a redirecting clone in their mind; that clone is making sure that they don’t hear the truth in any form. That is all that is happening. So I’ll start saying things, like: “There is a guru voice in your mind. I hear a therapist. I feel like this person is addicted to sex. Maybe you really want to write down what you are saying and read it back.” I’m not giving advice. I’m often confused as to why I’m saying this. There is no outer clue. I’m not getting any confirmation from the person I’m saying it to. In fact, usually they are denying what I say. I’m just saying what I feel projected from them. I’m getting inner clues as to who the redirect character is. Their True Self doesn’t know who that character is; the True Self isn’t part of the false self. It is separate. If I can say who it is by describing it, then they can put the puzzle pieces together. They will see what character needs some work.
Often when I say the clues, or who the redirect clone is, I feel like I’m saying something bad. That is because that is how they have wrapped this character. Don’t you dare expose him or her. So it is like they are saying that I must hold in my mind what they are holding as the truth. That creates a false-self connection. Meanwhile, I’m trying to break that connection. I know what I’m hearing isn’t true; I don’t want it in my mind. At that point, the ping-pong starts; and I know that it is the mentoring relationship that is allowing this to happen. I’ve agreed that I will help them get free. But they have a different definition of freedom…one that includes this false clone character. I start wanting them out of my life. I want the mentoring relationship to end. But I don’t really want them out of my life. I just want them to stop insisting that I honor their clone. I actually want the clone out of my life. They don’t yet want that clone out of their mind. So we are at odds.
The redirect character is in the person’s false self. The True Self can’t fix the false self. They are not mixed. But the True Self can expose the false self; you MUST let the false self go. You see, exposing is just what the True Self does. It is always shining a light on the dark false self. It is always saying, “Nope, not true.”
You have to see that the false self is false and let go. That is why the idea of soul is so fucked up; it mixes up the True and false selves. It makes Jesus into a God who fell into the illusion. Nope your True Self never fell. If you want to connect with it, you have to drop the false self. If you don’t let go, and you think you are connected, you are wrong.
If you make the decision to let go of something from the false self, you hear the True Self again. Bingo…your reconnected. This is why I say that all that reconnecting you did in workshops or meditating wasn’t reconnection. There was no letting go. You just found a quiet spot in the forest of your illusion. When I meditated, I thought it was so relaxing. From my regular mind, it was. Now it would feel like static on a radio or television. It’s horrible.
How do you know what is in your false self? You project it out on your stuff, your experiences, and other people. If you look at your projection and say, “That’s not mine. I didn’t create that,” then you are missing all the clues. You aren’t seeing what to let go whenever you think that others are causing your emotions. That’s the essence of the illusion. The other caused my emotions…blame, blame, blame. No, we are always the cause of our emotions except when we are children. Likewise, we aren’t causing the emotions of others. That goes for letting go too. When people blame letting go for anything, there is big ass, redirect clone in their mind. It is protecting their beliefs…making their beliefs into the truth. Letting go can’t possibly hurt anyone or anything ever. You can refuse to let go, but you can’t do it wrong. It is perfect.
It is much like I described with dieting. I was projecting out the fix on to others. I wanted them to make me thin. In the false self, people are often more aware of the cause or more aware of the fix. We have to let both go. Cause and effect is how we create; but it also fell and got divided. So the person with the fix tends to look perfect in the illusion. They project the cause on those who have not got the fixing belief in their mind. It’s simple, really simple. So we have to let the false cause and effect relationship go so that it doesn’t hold us in a place at the triangle bottom. We want cause and effect to work beautifully for us at the top of the triangle in first-cause thinking. At the triangle top, it just works. We don’t have to think about it at all.
Often the person I’m mentoring doen’t want to work on that redirect character, and so they leave mentoring. Then often, I see who the character was after they leave. They had created a false-self connection with me that was sending the message. “It’s not this character.” I’ll start to remember things that they said that didn’t make sense until they let me go. But I usually don’t hear from them again. They didn’t want freedom; they had decided to keep that character in their mind as a saint. They were trying to sell me on the idea that their saintly father, spouse, guru, grandpa, etc., was a True Self; he or she was not a True Self, they were a clone. I didn’t buy the act so they just went away. That happened a lot until I really saw the whole program. It was painful. But I could only keep letting go until I saw the whole thing.
You see, I don’t judge what another did in the illusion because we all did some shit. We were brainwashed, confused, mentally divided. We’d never do those same things from our True Self. So lock up the false self and judge them, or realize they aren’t that false self and love them. That’s the choice. I choose the later. If someone wants to hate the false self, it says to me that they still judge the false self as wrong or bad. How could that be? We’ve all been false selves. There comes a time when you just see this. You’d even give Hillary Clinton a hug. But YOU WOULD NOT AGREE WITH HER. You’d still discriminate with her. She doesn’t know what she is doing. She’s floating above her emotion and her pain. That’s probably why she gyrates and spasms.
I don’t ever try to change a person’s decision. If I tone my words down and make it pleasant for the characters, then I just feed their clone. I don’t want to do that. So usually I let that person go, and they either hear me one day or they don’t.
What I do is not a psychic thing. I’m not channeling. I’m substituting for your True Self. I’ve been doing this for a long time, and it wasn’t met with the love and respect that people have for channels and psychics. They say what peoples’ false selves want to hear. Or they catch a whiff of the True Self and fuck it up with level confusion. Clones aren’t fond of their True Self. So if you find your mind judging what I say, use that. That is a redirect character saying, “She doesn’t know what she is talking about.” If it does it to me, it will do it to your OWN True Self. So you want to expose that character in you. Then let them go. Let them decide to be with you or not. If you want to keep that clone around, then save yourself some money. Get a psychic reading.
So as you work with me, your True Self has support. It is like it is gathering support from this Circle. Then it is easier to tackle the clones in your life. Anytime, you get to your True Self, you are connecting with everyone here. So you’ll just feel unconditional love for them. That’s also why I say that I’m sort of assessing what you are all asking for. It isn’t like your false self is asking. It is like your True Self is saying, “This is what they need to understand so they can hear me (by me I mean your own True Self).”
So that is why I suggest that you let go as people talk on the calls. Eliminate any judgment. Eliminate any fear. Just hear them. Then you just love them if you don’t share any baggage. It’s wonderful. You are connecting with their True Self. This is why I say that no false self has any power over a True Self. Even a major religion only has a billion followers. But the True Self is connecting with everyone. It’s funny, it is the True Self that has the real power of numbers. But those in the illusion, don’t see that.
Having said all of that, let me remind you of Phil’s desire to have sex with everyone in the world. It was funny. But it was really just level confused. The first time I connected with someone else’s True Self, I never wanted it to end. I was in shock. It was so outrageously incredible from where I normally hung out with people. I felt so much love for him, and I felt it come back toward me too. It was better than sex. In my mind, I saw an image of us in a less solid state walking toward each other and then just merging into one. Sex was never the same after that. It seemed so rough and sweaty. This True Self connection was perfection. It was divine. Now that connection is more normal so it isn’t like a crazy miraculous experience. I only know that I don’t want to falsely connect with others again. It’s so worthless and painful. So Phil, your false self is funny. But that might show you what you really desire. It’s what you are trying to do in gaming. To become so authentic that you connect at the True Self level with all the other players. I think that is awesome.
Apologies and Self Deprecation
Rachel brought up the compulsion to apologize. That’s a funny thing. We often have beliefs about apologizing. It’s a good topic to look at. When I fully let go, I’m never looking for an apology. I don’t even think about it. If someone is being a dick, they are hurting themselves. They aren’t listening to their True Self, and they don’t want to hear it from me either. So that’s their problem. They are missing out. If I let them get to me, then I’m blocking my True Self. That’s just stupid on my part. People in the illusion can get pretty crazy over the apology topic. I have seen people apologize to tables when they bumped into them. I have no idea why someone would do that. They probably think they ran into a person, and it is just a habit to apologize. The only apology that we should give is an apology to our True Self. It’s been telling you everything you needed, and you listened to all those outer dicks instead. But don’t worry. It’s not looking for that apology; you’re already forgiven.
On a related topic. For some people, self deprecation is part of their persona. That’s popular in the progressive community. Some self deprecate in order to get compliments. They think if they put themselves down, people will say something like, “Oh you aren’t that bad.” Others think it makes them good or humble. We are really afraid of looking arrogant. Arrogant and humble are a pair at the bottom of the triangle that block us from exposing. That used to come up for me a lot. Being confident, which we are from our True Self, can sound like arrogance to some people. However, in our world, we are creating our future. So we don’t want to self deprecate. Or we will create a future life that sucks. It’s another good topic to review.
Reasons for putting on weight are numerous. I put on weight when I was still married, in the last few years before I divorced. There were reasons for that related to feeling really heavy in my mind with so many of my husband’s beliefs. Before I married, I did sometimes gain weight; but I lost it pretty easy. But after I married, it became really hard to lose weight. So I did periodic starvation diets, and I ran a lot. I’d lose the weight and gain it again. It was exhausting. So I had some diets in my false mind that I had once believed. I had to let go that those worked. I had to realize that fixing the effects isn’t fixing the cause. That took awhile. It was then that I noticed that all diet experts groom you. If you read any diet book or look at a diet commercial on Youtube, the beginning is a sales pitch. This diet will work for you because it worked for others. Do you see the belief that they use? It happened to others so it can happen to you. That’s a belief that reels people in. But it connects us with their false selves because the false self is the part of our mind that believes them.
So now we have to keep believing in this expert or we’ll gain the weight back. So I had collected a team of experts on this subject in my false mind. I had to see that they were the ones who had fear of being fat. I was taking their projection so that they could stay thin. Then I had to do what they did to lose the weight. Lovely huh! That’s what they do. I can’t say enough that nothing that comes from the false self fixes anything. NOTHING. It only looks that way. Everything is happening in our minds. So the people who look successful at losing weight choose some beliefs and decide that this is the truth. Then they obey those beliefs to perfection; so they work for them. Then they become the examples that others follow because everyone is looking for a false self clone to follow. But that doesn’t ever get us freedom or the success we actually seek. So we have to see their success as false. It is kind of like a magic act. It isn’t true.
If you could strip the effect-fixing beliefs off of that person’s clone mind, you would see that a fat person is resting underneath. They are terrified that could come out; if it did, they would be that 450 pound woman that they judge. So they fix those effects with their will; and they project the unwanted fat side of the triangle bottom on everyone they see who reminds them of their fear. Then they sell them their diet plan so that they can remain thin in their illusion. It seems so nice, like they want to help people. They don’t. That’s false. They want to stay thin, and they will do anything to accomplish that. What I just wrote applies to healing anything in our body. Those healing experts are all clones too. They hold disease in their false self and they cover it with a healthy clone. It applies to those prosperity experts or spiritual experts…clones, clones, clones. They fix the effect, and then tell you that they are free or authentic. Bullshit!
So we have to let these clones go, and we have to realize that the mental perspective rules our life. That means not listening to any other person. We want our mind to stay clean, or we lose our True Self connection. That is why we thought we needed the expert in the first place. We were a perfect match to their projection. We were looking for such a person. So we caused this false-self connection to happen. But we now want it to end. They don’t. We are completely serving their illusion. They are of no benefit to us. We have to see that our seeking was flawed. We were looking to fix an effect. We just had to let go of the cause. Then we would not have sought a way to fix the effect.
I also had a strange thing going on that was helping me to let this all go. When I looked in the mirror, I saw my aunt Irene. The weird thing is that my aunt is my dad’s sister-in-law; she isn’t a blood relative. I liked her a lot; and I thought she loved me unconditionally; but I never wanted to look like her because she was huge. My mother was thin and unkind; my aunt was so loving but huge. My false mind connected that and created a triangle bottom. At one point, I heard a voice in my mind that said, “Do you want to be beautiful on the outside or the inside?” I didn’t realize it was a trap. I immediately said, “Inside, inside, inside.” I was so sure, and I’d not change the answer today…not even for a date with Johnny Depp (when he used to be really handsome)…talk about being willing to sacrifice a false desire. But then I hit a core illusory belief. In the illusion, the mental and physical are opposites because everyone is fixing effects. So most people who look healthy are unhealthy underneath. The thin people are fat underneath.
Now on any topic, there are people who don’t think about that topic at all. In business I worked with people who were wealthy, and I never ever heard them talk about money. They never thought about it, and it just poured in. They couldn’t stop it if they wanted to. Such people have no false self on that topic. They are congruent. So that is where my work is now. In order to change my body, I have to let go of what I see in those fake thin people. I have to look for places where my eyes deceive me into thinking that someone who looks successful is successful and I’m not successful because I’m their opposite. I’m only incongruent because my false mind decided they were actually thin. It was looking at the physical, as false mind’s do. It’s going fast now. I feel more clear on this topic each day. It was strange. For awhile, it felt mean to see that…like I was raining on their parade. It isn’t mean. It’s win-win for all of us to be congruent. If they now get fat, they will see their beliefs. They can let them go too. Then everyone can be thin and healthy and beautiful.
Seeing my aunt in the mirror really jolted me into realizing that how my body looked had nothing to do with all the things they tell you. I didn’t look like my family. The problems I had in my body were actually the same problems that my husband’s parents had, not problems that my parents had. I could eat a little or eat a lot; and my weight didn’t change. I could exercise a little, or I could exercise a lot, I got no change. So I was being shown with absolute clarity that everything I learned about the body was false. I couldn’t make sense of it, so I just kept letting go. What else could I do? Then I moved to California which is the body judgment capital of the world. I could really feel projection from skinny people. They all considered themselves skinny because of what they did. I walk past a hot yoga studio nearly every day. I had to work on this. So my issue of body congruence is what I work on now. As I clear this, it is exposing all the things that I saw in the collective…things that I believed were true simply because they were real and so many people believed they were true.
But the biggest problem on this topic is that we have no idea what a True Self should look like. We are told extra weight is unhealthy. That causes disease labels to get projected on those who are overweight. We are told that pretty people are very thin. But I don’t find that true. I find that well proportioned bodies are attractive. Congruent people are beautiful to me.
I’ve learned so much by watching myself in social interactions. I was often surprised by responses that came out of my mouth. I’d see a tendency to project and catch it. I’d see myself trying to be kind or normal sounding. The wild dog in me was watching the trained dog in me and saying, “Run for it. Don’t come back.” But I was afraid to run. It was very enlightening. Normal social conversations often bond on wounds and drama. I’d watch my mind squirm to figure out how to get out of doing that. I didn’t have the answer yet. Then I’d work on it when I’d get back home. I’d open up that aspect of social interaction. Then I didn’t fall for that trap again.
Some people expect us to connect if they go to certain topics. Normal interactions can be about giving each other advice. I remember getting to a point where I realized that no one could give me good advice anymore. My mind was outside of everybody’s illusion. I was uncomfortable about that. Conversations can be about dramatizing old stories or memories. Gossip feels bad as you get freer. Judgments feel bad. So what do you talk about? Movies, food, what you want to do in the future. It’s funny. Now superficial stuff feels right. It’s light and funny.
Pay attention to what labels you give to body sensations for a day or two. You will learn a lot. We feel the emotion, and then we label it. It’s like an auto response. People rarely say to me, “I’m feeling emotion or nervous agitation.” They say, “I’m feeling fear. I’m feeling stress.” Pay attention to your labels, and then notice how you got that label. Try to strip the label away and just allow the emotion to be emotion, an indicator of false. Nothing more.
I remember the first time I labeled a thought jealousy. It was a projection. I knew it wasn’t my thought. I felt it as just emotion. Then I thought, “Why did I label it jealousy? How did I do that?” That got me to question labels. In that case, I’m sure it was projection, and it kind of came already labeled. Usually, emotion is just emotion for me. So I recognized the oddness of labeling emotions. Now I’m suspicious that when an emotion is labeled, it is a projection. So you might check that out for yourself. The clones love to give us pre-chewed food.
This Post Has 46 Comments
Thanks Cathy. Your response does help.
Oh shit!! Sorry I only started listening to the voice recording after I read the article and sent my comments and told my story. No disrespect intended to all.
Tracey, 49, from South Africa.
I signed up for the GC because more than anything else in my life I want to be free, mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. I want to live this life awake to my true self and as my true self.
Since finding you about 2 years ago now and reading much of your writings on both websites I finally decided to get my GC membership around 6 months ago.
Prior to GC, I tried almost everything out there so there is much confusion and beliefs in my mind.
As I am going through the program I am noticing so much rage, aggression and anger being felt by me. Although I am labelling these emotions it feels like I just want to shout FUCK YOU to everyone around me. Life feels like one big fat lie and I just don’t want to play with people in the illusion anymore- I want out!!. Fucken wake up already! Projection big time. It feels related to when I was a child and feminine to my father. I suppressed my anger as he would beat me if I had an opinion or expressed my emotions. Now I am feeling it and a part of me wants to give him what for, wants to tell him what a dickhead he was as a father because he doesn’t see it, he thinks that there was only one time that I didn’t deserve to trashed and beaten by him, all the rest was justified. He thinks he did a great job! But he was responsible for my emotions as I was a child and my true self was feminine to him so I wasn’t causing those emotions, he was. I am confused, am I now causing the emotions because I am not letting the past go? Because I’m not letting my false self go?
I’ve had over weight issues all my life, is it my mind thinking it is protection or maybe a fuck you to my father because he expected perfection from me.
Yes, I am in my story and feeling a victim but I just want to be free of it all. I want to get to step 3 on this but honestly, my judgment is winning over!
What exactly would you recommend I let go of? I can’t even see for myself what is on each side of the bottom of the triangle. Ah maybe it is victim and perpetrator, maybe it is dad should have and he shouldn’t have?
Your exposure will be appreciated, Cathy and members. Thanks.
Well sometimes I tell people to just hate someone full out. Get it out of their system. Sometimes there is so much bottled up emotion that you can’t see the forest for the trees. But then, at some point, you have to say, “Okay, this is my story. I need to let go and see where this goes.” That is a point where you want freedom, but you also realize that Act III of your full-circle story is about earning freedom. And no one else is doing that and no one else can do it for you. So this journey is going to be odd.
It sounds to me like you don’t actually believe your dad that much. Or maybe you don’t like his beliefs. That’s where I’d start. I used to take my ex and bring him up in my mind. I’d say, “Okay just let it rip. Tell me everything you hate about me.” Oh his character would go on and on. I had one rule. He could only say one sentence at a time. Then I got a break so I could let go. He’d speak and I was practicing hearing him say things that were false or unkind and letting them go so that his words didn’t mean a damn. It was like he was talking to the wall or to himself. That is who he was really talking to…himself When I got good at it in my mind, then I got to where I could do it in person too. Now his words didn’t create emotion in me because I didn’t believe them. Something being false causes emotions. But people say false things all the time. We don’t feel emotions unless we believe the person. In the end, you only want to believe only your True Self. I tell people to not even believe me. I’m not your True Self.
If you feel rage when you read something, stop. That means that you believe that sentence or concept. I talk about the illusion a lot. It’s always false. But I can’t say that every paragraph or you’d hate reading what I write. So use everything I write to let go. I write to trigger people. I want them to see their beliefs and let them go. Then their True Self will take over. Besides, there are no ramifications when I trigger you with my writing. You can do that in your room. No one even has to know that you had the belief and let it go. So life starts to get better without dealing with other people.
There is a saying that first you discover what has really been going on, and you are very angry. But in time, you realize that knowing what is going on gives you the ability to do something about it. In this program, we just let go.
Be patient. All of us have wanted to say fuck you. I don’t hide my past feelings as I write because I’ve been there. I want you all to see how it was for me and how it came full circle. I don’t want to present myself as some special person because I’m very norma. But I also know that better days are ahead. And I try to give you a little of that too.
Regarding the weight. I’ve been there too. It has more to do with not taking people’s projections and judgments. What happens in a physically dominant world is that people often feel superior right away if they see something flawed in someone. Weight is often a reason for people to project illness, laziness, lack of willpower, you name it. I would just allow it to happen. Then I’d let go of whatever I heard projected on me. Eventually, you come to love who you are inside; and then you start to regain the power to make the outside like the inside in a more natural easy way. That just takes time and patience. So don’t be hard on yourself about that. Use it to test yourself to see if you can let go of other people’s false perceptions. Work on the inner first. The outer physical is meant to one the effect of the inner, and in the end, it will be that way. Hope that helps. C
Hi. I live in Massachusetts. I am new to the Gold Circle this year, found the blogs about a year ago. The last few articles on GC-6 have been really good for me. I’ve gained a better understanding of the true mental perspective and the false physical perspective and that is helping with discrimination and letting go. Sometimes I feel like I’m making progress. I still feel like I’m floundering most of the time.
I have some struggles related to distraction/redirection. When I’m working on something, my mind will switch to some random thought and I won’t be able to get back to what I was working on. Also, when I focus on an emotion or other sensation, thoughts and beliefs do not come to mind. When I question my mind, I often don’t get answers back. Not sure if this is redirection or related to New Age things I’ve done in the past or both. I have a low level of emotion pretty much all the time.
I have some big desires that I’m not making any progress toward. I have been stuck in illness and apathy. I’d say my mother is a powerful clone and has been my false God character. It’s become pretty obvious through the reading that I’m stuck in the feminine in her illusion.
The conversation with Cindy is inspiring to find a creative outlet. The problem is I can’t even think of anything that I’d want to do. All of the things I used to really like to do are physically active and I haven’t been able to participate due to long term illness. False I know, but has been my reality.
Welcome Stephanie, All of that is pretty typical. We tend to see the clones as outside of us; and we see ourselves in the feminine. But your mother’s clone is actually in your mind. So that is why we do the character game. We don’t have to change the actual person, we just have to clean up our view of that person in our mind.
The Gold Circle is really about taking down the clones in our mind. That means that we have to take out all the beliefs that we liked from the New Age, etc. Often we have clones that we think are our True Self. But they are clones that sound like the True Self. So they are very tricky. This is where I find most people get stuck. They don’t feel emotion when they think a positive or spiritual thought; they have tons of emotion with the opposite. You can’t get rid of only one side of a pancake. So it is good to work on the triangle process a lot. That starts to break things up.
Mostly what you describe is a byproduct of the spiritual or enlighten or New Age clone. Remember we don’t need to learn the truth. We just have to take out what is false. As you keep going through the Gold Circle, you’ll find that the exposure I do of New Age clones helps. IT takes time. It took a lot of years to put all those beliefs in. It takes less to remove them, but it still takes time. Also having done New Age, you probably have a false notion of the True Self and freedom. You might also have some false desires that are causing your angst. Those will go away as you let go.
We can’t see outside of the illusion when we are inside of it. So the initiation process is a progression that is gradual; and it needs to be that way to be safe. Let the articles bring up your beliefs. When you feel emotions stop…let go of whatever you can, then move on. You’ll keep making progress. For a long time, people are stuck in projection land. So the causal belief can often be in another person, or it appears that way. Again the character game helps with that. Cathy
This is all sunshine and light for my morning. Thank you Cathy.
Im prepared to get chewed out. On this topic, getting kicked really hard sometimes, kicks me to a lane of clarity.
Don’t see anything wrong with what you wrote. It felt honest to me. I think you’re working through some big stuff. That’s awesome. C
Im very tired right now, all my above comments are from a place of exhaustion. I used what I had left in me to spark a conversation in hopes to discover more clarity on the subject.
I also suppose that I could be with a man on the plane of 1st cause. I would just have to let go around natures natural sexual duality of male and female and reproduction. I suppose my sexual relationship with men could be acts of unconditional love.
Of course as long as no judgment or force. C
in 1st cause, I naturally would choose a woman because she is different from me. She gives birth. She continues the species. 1st cause thinking steers me here. 2nd cause thinking steers me in all sorts of directions none of which honor the natural way of reproduction. 2nd cause opens up all sorts of lies and illusions. 1st cause is in harmony with the plumbing and fucntion of man and woman.
Yep so it allows you to be congruent and in the end that will feel authentic and freeing. C
Its odd, I remember being so confused about all of this sexuality thing. But now it’s all quite clear. Im not gay and I thought I was because of fear and not knowing that I was falling for lies and labels and getting sucked into illusions etc. Now, it doesn’t make sense for me to be with a man other than 2nd cause reasons. And why would I want to be in 2nd cause? I wouldn’t. Now I see that I’ve been in 2nd cause this whole time. Now its a matter of time before I let my partner know that i’m not gay and that I can really only be in peace by being true to myself and being gay wasn’t. Not wanting to hurt his feelings and the lifestyle change presents a whole closet of things to let go around before I completely make the jump.
Often we fear hurting another when we get clear. But in truth, you set them free too. That’s win win for all. Sometimes change is uncomfortable. But always best to be yourself. C
So on the call the guy said he wants to have sex with everyone but not with men. And he said that part almost like he was rushing to it as if his listeners would rush to think that he was also including sex with men. I know I wasn’t rushing to that thought, or even judging him at all. I was thinking, ok, great, he’s in 1st cause. He seemed to have arrived in a place of natural cause and effect based basic sexual function regarding sexual acts. (pleasure or reproduction. I imagine cave men from 15000 BC weren’t thinking “oh that’s a man, let me not touch him because the other cave men are going to call me gay. I imagine, cavemen of that time where in 1st cause and if another caveman wanted to pursue another man, it would be just a simple act of responding to relieve himself and maybe there wasn’t a woman around. But there was no judgement, or any 2nd cause responses. Im talking before the fall. So in a modern reality where 2nd cause or post fall paradigms are reigning in the illusion, a man could decide to choose to be with a woman because his dad says its the way of the lord and the way of nature. And so this man buys into it and becomes who he thinks he needs to be, chooses a woman and lives the labeled heterosexual life with the homosexual life as the way of sinners in his mind. I understand that these are all labels and are all second cause. I understand that Heterosexual and homosexual and the entire spectrum of labels are all false. Naturally knowing this now, I would most likely choose a female as a mate for myself but i wouldn’t judge myself if I decided to be sexual with men. I would just stay in the realm of 1st cause and be done with it. I have a lot to let go around gay ideas but I’m not prisoner to it. I know it’s all an illusion. would appreciate insight Cathy.
Such topics are hard for me to answer because I’m often misunderstood. I don’t judge anything that is consensual. Consensual is key or it isn’t win-win or first cause. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t baggage involved. If there is, I won’t notice. I’m not caring what others do.
Two people can be attracted for false reasons and things get messy. So I always look at desires carefully. If your desire is on freedom, or unconditional love, things will often feel bad that otherwise might feel good. So the desire is key.
Also everything we think and do is feedback. Always seeing more to let go. That’s normal in initiation and becomes a way of life. C
I wanted to introduce myself. I`m Felix, 27 years old and from Germany.
I was inspired to write in here because the part of the call where you talked about getting creative stroke a chord with me.
Right now I´m writing a novel and I feel like its about 80 per cent done.
I discovered letting go about two years ago, Cathy, when I wrote you some messages on facebook. But I feel like at the time I wasn´t taking letting go very seriously. A lot was going on in my life, I was suicidal and I felt like nothing was working.
So I eased myself into letting time after time and now I´m here. A week ago I registered for the Gold circle because I felt like I wanted to let go of so much more beliefs and understand how the clone works.
Right now at the end of the writing process of my novel a lot of beliefs came up like “Nobody cares what I write about anyway” or “I can´t make money just writing stories”. These are all clone voices most of them come from my dad who believes in hard work.
I just know that writing takes me out of the illusion and its my desire to finish this novel and publish it. I felt like giving up on writing probably a million times because of all these beliefs but I´m having so much fun writing dialogue, constructing a good story and use it as a way of seeing what´s really going on in my mind. Sometimes I write and later I read what I wrote and I can see a lot of beliefs staring back at me from the screen. Seeing them written down makes it somehow easier to discriminate because they are not just spinning arround in my head allday.
Cathy, you talked about your north star on numerous ocassions. Whenever I think about it, I just want independence. I want to life my life creatively, make the money I need, be healthy and have fun.
The article that you wrote about clones and new age brought up a lot of feelings of embarassment and disgust in me. It´s crazy, how much I trusted all these frauds that were talking about having and living the truth of life. Now I can´t even sit through one Eckhart Tolle video anymore without getting sleepy or being annoyed.
I can say that I made a lot of progess in my mind. I would´ve never started writing if I didn´t let go of a lot of beliefs that I can´t do it anyway. But I wanted to be a writer since I was 5 years old and my mom took me to the library for thte first time.
When I´m writing I feel like coming home. I just do it and feel like I´m in the flow.
I’ve had all the same thoughts Felix. I think most writers do. It’s part of the collective writer’s beliefs. So when they come up, notice they feel bad and let go. They truly are false. If it’s fun to write, it’s what you should do, at least for now. Who knows what the future holds but if you enjoy it, it’s right for now. Yes writing is an honest way to see our beliefs. I edit most articles about 10-20 times. I’m cleaning up my mind as I catch errors. I enjoy writing and letting go. So it’s fun to do both together. Sounds the same for you. Keep at it. Let go of thoughts about what others think. They don’t matter anyway. C
I love the food discussion. It was a big component to let go around food and fitness more recently. Took a while and knocked me off me feet a little. It bought to the surface loads of beliefs about health I didn’t know I have or had. Was uncomfortable to say the least.
I wad shown the door at 16. Wasn’t my choice but, even at 16, it was a great sense of freedom. It was one of my more enjoyable times. I had a lot of fun! I understand more now why it was so enjoyable. I wasn’t knee deep in the illusion or laden with beliefs around stability.
Yea becoming a responsible adult messes up freedom! C
Okay. Yes, that would be good to discuss on Saturday.
Hi Cathy, yes. I have been letting go, I’ve still got some work to do, but it’s a big sign of progress. I can’t wait to get my own place to host in a major clone free zone. I’ve noticed there is quite a few of us still living at home with our parents. Before I was somewhat content but still looking to move. But over the last 3 months I’ve had a stronger desire to leave, and can see how it’s been holding me back somewhat. Is it part of a hold back with pushing forward with our truth?
Haha yes I can be quite the nag about getting people to move out and get their own place. Just ask Ashley, Phil, or Kelly. We should have Phil and Kelly talk about that on the call on Saturday. They were terrified, but it has worked out so well for them. Now they have so much more freedom to create and they can work out their issues with the parents with that distance on their side. c
Hiya, I’m now experiencing an awakening with food again. I have a strong desire to experiment with food, like when I was a child and teen. I’m watching more food TV shows and reading more cookery books. Food got pretty Grey and same old when I was eating diet food and as a vegetarian. I have a pretty big library of cooking books which my mother brought. And I’m enjoying looking at the different recipes, my taste buds have opened up more and I can feel that my mind is taking notes to create in the near future.
Hi Jade, I actually hear that quite a bit. People start enjoying food and the creativity of it again. It’s such a great way to spend time with friends and family. Food is neutral conversation. So that is a good thing. Always let go on any beliefs you’ve had about specific foods as being good or bad and the joy will keep coming. C
The weight issue is really interesting – I deal with it too but in the opposite way I think. I was always super skinny and in grade school my teachers worried that I was sick. I have this thing with food where I dont want to eat too much because I feel like it would be selfish. So i always leave like a drip of milk in the carton – which I’m sure is annoying as hell. I kind of deprive myself or something so as not to seem like a burden – but then i go to the opposite spectrum sometimes and waste a ton of food and not really care. Also I sometimes feel like starving myself is like exercising my will power or something. Like depriving myself in some way leaves more for the world. My dad used to say my eyes were bigger than my stomach. In general I’ve always been told I was a burden – and that having kids sucks and ends your life or something so I always felt like I didnt want to take too much – this goes beyond food too – also with other things…but again, i overindulge sometimes and go to the extreme. Its a weird seesaw effect. I’m letting go of those “burden” beliefs but I always seem to run into alot of anger – this is a good sign I know. I used to have trouble with shoplifting and stealing. Horrible I know. Somehow i felt cheated or something so I was entitled to whatever I stole. I grew up hearing that everyone is being cheated, and that my parents were cheated out of a good life because we were born. Anyway, nice to meet you all I’m Stephanie.
I’d look for the bottom of the triangle on that one. Sounds like burden vs entitled or binge vs deprive. If you let go of both sides, it should ease things some. C
Hi..I’m Carla from lebanon. I found Cathy’s website 2 years back. I started letting go on the spot thx to Cathy and slowly got myself out of bed..started moving again!! My symptoms could only budge when i began letting go.
I still have a long way to go ofc…I still did not attend any calls not sure why…but im always here, reading and challenging my beliefs.
I can see how much my mind has changed and keeps on changing…i feel like im going back to being carla again!! The freedom to be me again..pure joy😜
Just wanted to add, that I too am experiencing weight gain. As my mind feels lighter, my body feels heavier. Very odd. And I don’t like it, but it does bring up a lot of “reasons”. It’s since living with my new partner, although I don’t know if that’s connected. What I’m not doing (and what I would have done in the past, or tend to think I probably should), is change the way I’m eating, nor doing more exercise. I don’t want a short-term fix that involves discipline or restrictions.
I’m starting to think we might have been separated at birth Phil, I’m a gamer although it’s taken a back seat since doing this work. And the sex with every one came up for me. I haven’t revisited this yet lol.
Hello everyone! I’m Jerome from Singapore. I found Gateway to Gold on July 2015 and have been letting go ever since. It has been an intense ride, working on those characters and psych reversals. As the days go by, I have been feeling more inspired and creative. Healthier, too. I’m becoming clearer about what I really desire, and that list will only get bigger. I can’t wait to uncover more stuff. To Cathy and everyone here, thank you for everything!
I’m Damien, 35, UK-South East. Wife, young Child and a Warehouse Manager.
I found Gateway to Gold by chance. Back in July/September 2016 after dabbling in some of Eckhart Tolle’s work. ET raised more questions in my mind and I started to do some research on the internet. I came across Gateway to gold by chance while trying to refine a search request in Google. I never looked back and never did I want to.
My mind is a far cleaner place and my mental score is tallying up. I’m undoing a lot of the shit I’ve dumped in there or what others have dumped in their. When I first started, it felt like I was trying to clean up shit, with a shitty mop and no bucket. I still get that but, I am getting better at cleaning it up in my mind and letting go. As I do this work with your all, it seems like the tools Cathy provides become more and more clearer and cleaning up my mind becomes more natural. For me, smells and places around me become more familiar. Like I know them already. Not sure if that makes sense to any one. I’ve started to get those flashes of those day’s as a child where I just looked forward to the day, regardless of anything else. Their brief glimpses. But I know I’m moving in the right direction. I still have to work on my desires and creativity. I was always creative as a child. I’m peeling back the layers to reveal it again.
The ride does get uncomfortable sometimes. I tend to come away from what I’m reading and let go on the things around me or thoughts that pop up. Then something will just become clear. I’ll go back and read a post or article again. Then I see that I can read it with a different view or sense of clarity.
I’m glad I’m on this journey with you all. Enjoy your film festival Cathy!
Hey Guys, it’s Shera. You may have heard me talking about my clones/illusion on other calls. I live in Minneapolis, Minnesota. I found Cathys sites in 2014 and have been working on letting go ever since. I’ve been struggling with allowing myself to be creative. What Cindy and Steve shared was truly helpful. Thx so much Cathy and everyone for being here.
I can totally understand the weight gain as well. The reason why I put on weight was a combination of all the reasons. I converted to a more plant based eating pattern. I used food as a barrier prior, which I started to do again when I couldn’t face reality or when I was overwhelmed. Whilst I was going through this process, food seemed like the only thing I could hang on to, to keep me grounded with what was coming up, and I needed to break diet eating habits. In the mist of it I was deluded with what I was eating as well. I must say that I did enjoy eating the vast food though, lol. But I was tricking myself over the fact that I was over eating as well. So as I am more aware of my overeating, i’m eating more balanced now, which is varied. As a vegetarian my main meal was like baby food, lol. I’m more of a plant based eater but i’m not a vegetarian. I must add that prior to finding this process, I had my first true self elevated love connection, which was intense, especially as it wasn’t expected and the person was married. Although the boundaries were respected, the experience elevated me, which left me on a low when it ended, as i was dealing with it from my false self, and felt i would never experience it again. But I now see the beauty and gift of it. It has happened several more times after, which can come with some complications, which i went into in the forum. But I wouldn’t have it any other way, I also have to be careful that a character flaw doesn’t high jack it which I have been working on to get rid of.
Hello Everyone and Cathy,
I missed the call altogether because I didn’t see it on the calendar. Lost in false mind perhaps. No matter though as I am listening now and enjoying everyone. I am brand spanking new to this program and Cathy’s teachings and am still on a learning curve with the language used, clones, characters, etc although it’s all pretty self explanatory. It all resonates and makes so much sense to me though and I felt compelled to join. Since I’ve been reading and listening to the calls I have felt lighter. It’s very liberating to get off the circling locomotive of self help and gurus and healing and inner children and all the “processing” that goes along with my long term desire to live as my True Self. I think that is what most drew me into this program: the talk of True Self, because that has been my A number 1 most important and deepest desire for a long time: to experience my true pure self.
Ok, just wanted to introduce myself and say hello!
All best to All,
PS, Cathy I loved what you said about people even telling us how to breathe…I have gotten that so many times from people and it always shoots spasms of emotion thru me like who the eff are you to tell me how to breathe! Love the liberation!
Hi! Laura here and I’m living in Texas. I missed the call and the intros but have made the other calls. I found Cathy’s amazing site about a year ago, but only recently figured out that I spent a good portion of that time letting go from a clone. Bleck! I have been going through bouts of letting go fests and then sort of avoiding it for days and then quickly catching other stuff. Now I am dreaming of situations and in my dreams telling myself that I need to let that go and that’s not me! I do it sometimes and other times I just tell myself that I’ll do it tomorrow. Hmmm. The grooming part and my parents opened a whole new bag for me to explore. I realize more of how I am doing that to my kids. I went through a real lonely phase as I was a helper personality. Many friends have exited the scene since I am no longer playing that game and I yoyo’d with those friendships because I was scared to be alone. Also, my identity was wrapped up in it. Now I am feeling comfortable in the space. I finally came up with a desire to travel. I’m in Japan right now, so heck yea! The articles on the Gold Circle are a gift and I really feel comforted to be part of this brave, bold group. Thank you, Cathy!
I can definitely relate to the divine love connection, it’s the best feeling. I’ve touched on it before in the forum . Which also has different degrees. Such as from a lovers connection and a family or friend connection.
It was great hearing you all in the calls and reading your comments. I am more familiar with Phil s voice ( though I m happy he gave up that desire:). When I will be in a stronger true self mode I will say more about me, hopefully I will start having desires and create again like I did as a child. So I will share about it.
Hello! I’m Amanda, and I’m from Minnesota.i first found NLNL and G2G over two years ago, after flirting with different aspects of the New Age just trying to figure out how to fix me. I’d say my marriage was falling apart, except that it was never put together in the first place. I’ve never been able to make my own decisions about my life, and I’ve always been held as responsible for more than my fair share (or so I believe)- so those have been major themes in my letting go.
This call had so much good stuff in it… I think my favorite part was when Cindy was talking about being creative. I’ll have to listen a couple more times.
I’m still stuck in apathy and fear… I would tell you I don’t know what I want, I don’t know what I like and I don’t know who I am. I’m ready to end this phase of my life and move into the next. That’s why I’m here.
Hi! I really enjoyed reading the comments above, it’s good to get to know you all. I too am not always on my own so don’t often speak up but I had the house to myself the other night, niiice :-). I’m from Staffordshire in England.
I just think Cathy is amazing, her wisdom is ace. I see things clearly and practice, then get stuck and in a muddle like Elizabeth has said. I also can let go from the true self but then can easily land back in it (false) and wade around trying to get myself out for quite a while again. That can be annoying.
I’ve picked up lots again just from reading the above. My life is slowly changing I can see that.
I like reading Damien’s comments too, not sure if he’s around at the mo.
Have a great time Cathy in Palm Springs! x
Hi there. I’m Elizabeth. Born and grew up in England, but lived in France for 24 years. I was coming to the end of my marriage when I came across Cathy’s work, about 5-6 years ago, I think. I can’t really remember how or when exactly. I’ve come such a long way since then, and there’s still so much to clear out. I realise that, because I have recently got remarried, and some of the old stuff is coming back up again. I was raised in a very strict fundamentalist sect, so even though I had walked away from that (and been excommunicated from my family and everyone I ever knew), and no longer believed in most of it, there are still a few remnants that come up. I’m never really sure, but I think I’m on to the more collective beliefs now, rather than the personal ones. I’m now living in Australia, and my letting go has brought me to the point of living in a place I love, and doing my art which I hope/desire to make into a profession, but that, I guess I’ll find out if it’s a true desire or not. I have certainly been pushing the boundaries enormously, and have achieved results I never really would have imagined a few short years ago. So many “I can’t” or “it’s not possible” come up, but I just keep telling myself that I don’t know that to be true. I don’t actually know that I can’t, so let’s give it a go. And I do. So far, the only thing I wonder about in my creating, is who the people are to share my desires with me. And that’s all quite right, even if I really want them certain ones to and they don’t. I often hear people describe me as brave and courageous. But I know that’s not true. I’m just not believing any more in the usual restrictions. I’m loving the freedom and wholeness.
I’ve not participated in the calls – mostly because of time difference, or not being alone at the right time – but I love reading everything.
Sometimes I’m just so clear about everything, and whose shit is who’s, but other times I get quite confused and lost, caught in projection, and not quite sure who is projecting on whom. I suspect I have a tendency to second-guess myself, and not always trust my true self. I’m learning more very day. I love this journey. It’s fascinating and rewarding and liberating, and sometimes quite lonely. I love being responsible for myself and my creations. And I love me and others more and more.
Funny what you say, feels like I know this stuff. lately I seem to just know a lot. But my false mind is still busy as hell , it managed to project my fall story everywhere in the past months. Even into the periodic table of elements ! And I don’t t know chemistry . did n know I had the SFwriter in me lol. …it is getting ridiculous and silly yet I still believe great part of it with the reversals. And yes Cathy your reactions helped to identify the great re-director in my life, for reasons different that yours it wants me to not remember abuse , to shut up about it and to go to therapy. You have a better offer, this character doesn’t , it just wants me to be a slave and a victim and play nice about it. reading my comment I can see how you sometimes have the role of my true self in the story for the moment, I can t wait to play it myself full time . I wish you a great time at the festival.
Hi all, I really enjoyed listening to the call. I couldn’t talk due to being in the company of others. I’m Jade, from England. I’ve been working on letting go for over a year now. I randomly found Cathy’s website by keying in why teachers were leaving the teaching profession. At the time I was running away from performing on the stage and facilitating personal development workshops. Over the last 3 months I have been working on a humorous tale for children. Through this process I’ve reconnected with my love for humour and playing with words as a child. Now I’m looking to see how my manuscript goes and I’m working on some of my other creative ideas.