Stuck

This topic contains 8 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  Rachel Eckert 2 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #5935

    Cathy
    Keymaster

    Rachel and Damien gave you great responses. The only thing I’d add is that you might be asking a question and not letting go of each thought that comes up. People who have done other things, especially self-help and New Age, all seem to have this stupid belief that if you find a reason, you’ve let go. They developed a very destructive habit of just wanting meaning or reasons. When you ask a question, you must recognize that every answer that arises, even if you like the answer is false. You don’t accept reasons.

    People think that their mind offers value, it doesn’t. 99% of what our mind says is false. Much of it doesn’t matter as it doesn’t have second-cause judgment like adding 2 plus 2 to get 4. You have to get used to the notion that if you think something and feel emotion, the emotion is saying that belief is false. It is the recognition that it is false and has no value to you or anyone that enables us to let go. So you just have to keep trying until it clicks.

    Also, I suspect you have a clone in there that doesn’t want to let go. As you move further into the articles I tell how to identify and let go of the clone. It is a big block to many.

    • #5963

      Rachel Eckert
      Participant

      Thank you Cathy.

      Appreciate the response. Damien and Rachel gave me a lot to work with so I am just going to keep moving along. Thanks,

      Rachel

  • #5925

    Rachel Eckert
    Participant

    Thankyou both for your responses. They have been very helpful and I really appreciate it. I will keep working on it ūüôā

  • #5899

    Damien
    Participant

    Hi Rachel,

    There’s nothing to add from What Rachel A has said, I found her answers quite helpful too.

    You don’t want your emotion to leave. It’s telling you something’s false. It took me a while to fully understand this, even as simple as it seemed. Even now, a programme will come up telling me ’emotion means true or it’s real’ and it’s not, it means I’m thinking something false.

    As Rachel said, our minds have had a long time to absorb a lot of shit, it didn’t happen over night. Cleaning that shit out won’t either.

  • #5893

    Rachel Atkins
    Participant

    Hi Rachel,

    I’d start out with letting go of the idea that I’m stuck or ‘I’m not doing it properly’ or any other idea that’s telling you you can’t do this.
    I’ve been letting go for about three and a half years now and can’t fully remember how it felt when I started but I do know that it took me a week to get to the core of the first belief I let go and it was well worth the week! I didn’t discover Cathy’s blogs til I”d been letting go for about 18 months and what I did to start off with was just keep asking myself why I believed something.
    For example I’d start out with a thought like ‘I’m not supported’ and just keep asking myself Why I believed that and let go of all the reasons my mind gave me – eventually I got to the underlying belief and just KNEW it was mine and KNEW it was false and instantly let it go.
    When I discovered Cathy’s blogs I found No Labels No Lies to be really really helpful in terms of the ‘practicalities’ of letting go – and would read and re-read posts over and over.
    The triangle process is really useful (I found) to help you start to break the dual aspect of beliefs – we are so used to believing something is either good or bad that it takes time to get used to the idea that both good and bad are false and there’s a third (True) perspective.
    Getting a really good understanding of roles and projection also really helped me – again mainly from No labels No lies.
    I’ve also found the character game invaluable and still use it all the time.
    I won’t wish you luck, cos you don’t need it (it’s false anyway! :-)) but you do need determination, and to learn to trust yourself to get there, so keep going, you’ll get the hang of it.
    All the best,
    Rachel(!)

    • #5895

      Rachel Eckert
      Participant

      Rachel,
      This was helpful. I think I have been getting stuck trying to let go of the other beliefs that are causing me emotion and not finding the exact cause. Maybe this is where I will start. My question though is you said You would ask your mind why you believed something then let it go until you found the underlying belief. By letting it go, would the emotion completely dissipate with each belief or would you just move on to the next belief till you found the cause? I feel like this is partly what is confusing me. Clearly I have some work to do.
      Thanks for your response,
      Rachel

      • #5896

        Rachel Atkins
        Participant

        I think it’s going to vary depending on what you’re letting go of. But for me, the feeling might get less intense on some issues as I let go of beliefs about them, but I’d only feel real relief when I hit the ‘underlying belief’.

        I suspect part of the problem is that we don’t just hold one belief on a subject, but many, and they tend to link together!
        Like my example of ‘I’m not supported ‘there’s a whole load of beliefs just in those 3 words: e.g. I should be supported, there’s a right way to be supported, etc…

        I tend to think of it as like a ball of tangled up threads, to untangle it, you need to just choose one end and undo each knot as you work your way through it. And when you’ve undone one thread, you start on the next…

        Are you writing as you let go? This really helps, particularly in the beginning, we write slower than we think so we catch a lot of automatic thoughts that we normally don’t think to question.
        I’m guessing you’ve already read Cathy’s first Gold Circle article on writing, but even if you have, have another look of it.

        Be patient with yourself, too, you didn’t get all your beliefs overnight, and you’re not going to let go of them overnight, either.

        Rachel

    • #5894

      Rachel Atkins
      Participant

      I forgot to say. I find it really helpful to use a thesaurus. Cathy uses the analogy of the mind as a computer and beliefs as files – and it really seems to be that way with me. Play around with the words/phrasing of a belief/thought that’s come up for you. You can feel that you’re on the right lines with it, and know (logically, at least) that it’s false, but for me, until I hit on the right word or phrase that I filed the original belief under (whether I got it from someone else of formed it myself) I can’t actually FEEL that it’s False.
      When I finally hit on the right word/phrase I seem to simultaneously know a) that’s what I’ve been believing and b) it’s False and I just don’t need it.
      I use the thesaurus.com website which also gives antonyms words (can help with letting go of both sides of the bottom of the triangle) and it also often gives the etymology of words, which again, can really help me see that it’s False.
      hope that helps.

      Rachel

  • #5886

    Rachel Eckert
    Participant

    Hi,
    I am pretty new to letting go I started trying a couple months ago. Recently I realize that I haven’t been fully letting go, the emotions are never leaving. I can spend alot of time on one belief watching the emotion which never seems to leave. I am truly not sure if I have let go of anything honestly. I will spend a lot of time trying to find the cause and still not seem to come up with anything. I have gotten through some of the readings and I am discriminating and I can see beliefs but nothing seems to get resolved or the emotion never dissipates. Did anyone in the beginning have this happen? There mind would just refuse to let go of even beliefs that seemed simple? I am going to keep trying and continue to watch my mind. But if anyone has any tips or got past this someone I would appreciate it.

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